Maybe I’ve Found What I’m Looking For?

Long before they were tormenting teenagers and conspiracy theorists with the gift of free music, U2 provided a substantial portion of the soundtrack for my high school existence. “Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” was one of my favorites by far. I really identified with that ongoing pursuit for what you know must be “out there.”

I loved this song so much I even convinced a high school girlfriend that it should be “our song,” which in hindsight was one of the more ridiculous choices of an adolescence riddled with ridiculous choices. I mean, what young lady wants her boyfriend to suggest he’s still looking around for who may finally the ONE? Was it me dooming this relationship or recognizing it was already doomed?

BUT FEAR NOT!

I sense you pulling away! This is not the kind of blog where I navel-gaze and ruminate on my teen years and the requisite angst that comes with that time. This is the kind of blog where I tell you that I may have finally found (a) thing I’ve been looking for.

Monday was my first day at the Houston site for The Iron Yard. Soon I will learn more than I ever knew existed about Ruby/Rails, and I will still barely scratch the surface. But for now I’m just looking forward to twelve weeks of pain and torture with the promise of gaining actual real-world marketable skills at the end.

I put in my notice at my old job last Monday and worked through Friday. I stored/threw away/donated/left most of my life in Baton Rouge, grabbed some clothes and books and whatever would fit in my car and drove straight to Houston yesterday night. I rolled into Houston around 2AM Sunday night/Monday morning and 7 1/2 hours later I was seated in a converted garage/warehouse listening to John welcome us to a new life of web development.

And I feel totally great about it. This is how I know I might have found something I’ve been looking for. I want to be challenged, I want to engage and jump into something wholeheartedly. I also have to say I’d really like to be rewarded for meeting those challenges, even if it’s just knowing I came out and conquered something instead of being scared and only doing what I already know I can do.

And trust me, yesterday was a bit of a challenge. I haven’t touched anything Ruby or even Terminal related in weeks trying to prep for the move, and it showed. Not that I had done anything but putz around with it anyway. I’ll try to alternate between the pragmatic and the personal on this blog, so I’ll have a lot more to say on this theme later, but I wanted to start by saying I’m really feeling inspired this evening.

I want to write this down now for when I’m hating life and searching for that one line in a thousand with “puts” spelled “putts” or something equally mundane/maddening. I also wan to remind myself that these next few weeks are part of my whole life. I don’t intend to stop writing when the class is through, so this is just the beginning of a lifelong process of reflection, learning, and honing a craft.